I have never been skinny and I don't think I would want that, but I most certainly did not ever wish to be a joke for all society. Its hurts when people say things obvious.. I can't blame people I am that Fat girl with such a pretty face..I want to be a mom so bad but refuse to get pregnant fat.. I want to wear clothes with out covering up so i dont feel discusting.. I am tired of worrying If I can fit in a booth at a restaurant..
I had a doctors appointment for my yearly pap exam. I was so ashamed I cried when I was on the table my blood pressure shot thru the roof and I wanted to just die... then the DR. advised me I had gained some weight.... THANKS A BILLION DOC.. as if I did not know..
I Refuse to have a surgery to correct my weight I am not lazy and I am fully capable of loosing the weight.. or so I tell myself this... Sounds a lot easier in the head.. Sometimes I cry when I look at myself or wish I would not wake up..
I do not want to embarass my family and friends... most of all I just want to be healthy so I can do things like travel, shop, get married have babies and NOT BE SEEN AS OBESE~~~~~ WOW That is a Yucky word~~~~~!!