yesterday was a bad day. not as far as my diet (monday was the bad day for that) but as far as my morale.
monday i was just a little tooooo eager to taste those mashed potatoes i made. that resulted in the low morale yesterday. for the first time in three weeks the number on the scale had actually gone up. stayed the same i could have delt with, but up? i kept wondering what the point was. i mean, why make myself suffer so much when one little stray can have more negative effect than a day of behaving perfectly. i kept wondering if i should just give up.
but give up and be where? fat and unhappy. sick of buying big clothes and sick of not liking what i see in the mirror. yeah. dieting sucks. it really really really f*ing sucks. but so does being fat.
and why not keep trying just for a while longer. i mean, i didnt put all this weight on in a day or a week or a month...so why shouldnt it take a little time in order to take it off. yeah, i screwed up. but yesterday i behaved and the number on the scale was back in line today. and if i behave today, maybe tomorrow i'll actually smile when i get on the scale. and if not tomorrow...there is always next week, and next month.
its just a matter of not giving up. which, like everything worth doing...is a lot easier to say then it is to do.
posted @ Wednesday, January 20, 2010 6:07 PM